ACT 1
On our show tonight we have an attempt at breaking a world record. The event: The longest sustained saxophone note using circular breathing. We turn on the camera and find Aaron Bing out on 53rd Street. Aaron explains Circular Breathing, allowing yourself to breathe in and breathe out simultaneously. This made me wonder, if you can circular breathe, why is their a limit to how long you can sustain a note on a saxophone?
Standing by is Judge Stuart Claxton from Guinness World Records. The judge makes a quick mention of two assisting, from the Manhattan School of Music, Chris Rosenberg and Justin Dicioccio. I questioned the two assistants immediately, figuring they just came along to get on TV. But then again, I don't know much about world records in playing the saxophone.
The current record for the longest sustained saxophone note is 47 minutes, 5.5 seconds.
Dave says the current is held by Kenny G. . . . but then is told it is not held by Kenny G. Uh oh. I know the name is not on the card. In a long game of telephone, a message is sent from person to person to person until it gets to Dave. The world record is held by Vern Burchfield.
Without further ado, Aaron gets busy on his saxophone.

"3:10 to Yuma," the new western starring Russell Crowe and Christian Bale, opened today. Critics are already raving about the film. We watch a review.
Announce:

"In a lawless land, the code a man lives by is the code he could die by. The critics are raving about '3:10 to Yuma.'
-'A welcome throwback to western tradition' - Peter Travers
-'Hollywood needs to make more movies like this.' - Richard Roeper, Chicago-Sun Times
-'Russell Crowe and Christian Bale are so ruggedly handsome, you'll want to commit a lewd act in a movie theater bathroom stall' - Senator Larry Craig.
'3:10 to Yuma' - in theaters everywhere Friday"

ACT 2
Aaron Bing is still going strong just under 9 minutes. Dave offers Aaron a chair but Judge Claxton says he must remain standing.
And this just in: the record is held by Vann Burchfield, not Vern Burchfield.

And then Dave read the Late Show FUN FACTS.
Someday you'll understand.

ACT 3
RACHAEL RAY: from her very own show, the "Rachael Ray Show" and a bunch of other things with her name on it. For a full listings of her work, check out her website at www.rachaelray.com
How was her summer? In a word: Busy! She did 180 shows last year and spent the summer traveling through South America and Europe taping "30 Minute Meals" and "Tasty Travels." She describes it as interesting, but not at all fun. And she stayed one step ahead of one natural disaster after another. Peru got hit with an earthquake right after she left; a hurricane hit Argentina moments after she left. Makes me a little concerned for this Monday's show.

How was Rachael as a kid? Do girl stuff? Rachael was a Girl Scout . . . but got kicked out for repeatedly bad behavior. She got too many demerits. Once you reach the demerit limit, you are kicked out. Rachael got her first demerit for changing the words to one of the Girl Scout songs and substituting inappropriate lyrics. And then she got in trouble for altering the Girl Scout uniform. The big demerit was when the Scouts were in a covered wagon supposedly to learn something but instead they were all goofing off. Rachael hints there may have been some secret drinking going on. Well, one of the girls fell out of the covered wagon and broke her arm. After that, Rachael was done. The story has a happy ending, though. This past year during National Girl Scout Week, Rachael had some Scouts on the program. They made her an honorary Scout.
Let that be a lesson to you all . . . . get a TV show and you will be forgiven for every bad thing you have ever done.
As the conversation turns to food, Dave says he believes there is not one restaurant in New York City that is not infested with vermin, whether it be flies, bugs or rats.. It can't be helped. Rachael disagrees, but is willing to believe. I believe it, and like most New Yorkers, we'd rather not talk about it and just pretend it doesn't exist. . .. sort of like most Americans and the war.

Did you know if you can't get tickets to the "Rachael Ray Show," you can see her at Madame Toussaud's Wax Museum here in New York City. She asks if it's possible to be jealous of your own wax figure. Rachael claims the wax figure looks better than her; and it's got a bigger rack We take a look at the photo of the waxy Rachael and I must admit, I tried to be a gentleman but I looked at the photo and then stared at Rachael's breasts. They looked fine to me. She wasn't ready for all that went in to getting a wax figure made. The Toussaud people come and take photos of every inch of your body from every possible angle; 360 degrees.
Dave claims that no matter the wax figure, if you squint they all look like Cher.
To finish up, Dave wants some info on Sweet Breads. What are they made of? Guts, glands, and goobers. It's not something she likes to sup on, though she adds you can make anything taste good if you swim it around in butter.

ACT 4
FRANK RICH: an Op-Ed columnist for the New York Times and the author of the bestselling book, 'The Greatest Story Ever Sold." He was also the chief drama critic for the New York Times for 13 years. Before that, he had spent years reviewing television, film and theater and he had come to be known as "The Butcher of Broadway" for some of his harsh reviews and the power he wielded over whether a show might be successful or not. What was the worst theater production he had ever seen? Frank Rich answers, "Moose Murders." It has become a legend in the theater world for being so bad. It opened and closed the same night. It took place in a hunting lodge in the Adirondacks and was a murder/mystery that made no sense. The character that was wrapped in gauze and a quadriplegic throughout the show turned out to be the murderer. Also that night, someone in the first few rows, right where the critics sit, had either vomited or was covered in vomit, so right from the beginning there were people streaming out. As bad as that was, the stink from the play was even worse.
Something about Frank's description of "Moose Murders" struck me as familiar. I remember I had written something about an awful Broadway play and wondered if this was the play I referenced. A quick check of past Wahoos led me to May 12, 2004. I had been enjoying the terrible reviews of the Broadway production of "Prymate." Many critics called up the dreadful memory of "Moose Murders." I had then did a bit of research of the 1983 bomb and found something written by Peter Filichia about "Moose Murders." And in the article, he makes mention of Frank Rick. How about that? If you want to read more about "Moose Murders," check the Wahoo Archives for May 12, 2004.
Frank eventually grew tired of being the Drama Critic for the Times. His interest in melding of politics and pop culture (Clinton/Arsenio; Quayle/Murphy Brown) led him to become an Op-Ed columnist writing about the political scene. At times it's a bit daunting to come up with a column every week but luckily "the Bush Administration is a gift that keeps on giving" and mentions Karl Rove; Alberto Gonzales, and Larry Craig as great column fodder.
Frank Rich - "The Greatest Story Ever Sold: The Decline and Fall of Truth in Bush's America." It's in stores now. And his Op-Ed column appears each week in the Sunday New York Times.

ACT 5
WILL IT FLOAT? I have no memory of this. Did we even do it? If we did, it was to be a big bag of cat food. Did it float? I don't know.

ACT 6
We check in with Aaron Bing out on 53rd Street and we see the sad sight of the saxophone being held down his side. Aaron could not beat Vann Burchfield's record. Aaron's time: 39 minutes, 40 seconds. Aaron ran into problems from too much saliva build up. Paul suggests that Aaron get one of those dentist vacs. Judge Claxton congratulates Aaron on his tremendous attempt and says Aaron only needs to work on the condensation. But there are no losers on the Late Show (except sometimes the audience). What do we have for Aaron Bing? Flowers. Flowers?

ACT 7
ARCTIC MONKEYS: From their CD, "Favourite Worst Nightmare," Arctic Monkeys performed "Fluorescent Adolescent."

And that was our show for Friday, September 7, 2007.



Oh, darn. My $15, two-and-a-half month-old Stephon Marbury Starbury sneakers are beginning to rip.

So why wasn't the name of the current record holder for longest sustained saxophone note using circular breathing on the blue card? A few reasons:
1. On the original blue card were already 4 names: Aaron Bing, Judge Stuart Claxton, and the two guys from the Manhattan School of Music there to assist. Adding another name would create more clutter.
2. Originally it was thought the record was held by Kenny G. Kenny G had the old record. If the record had still been held by Kenny G, I would have included the name Kenny G.
3. Kenny G's name was tossed around when this idea came to be. Dave had Kenny G on the brain. The only reason the name of Vann Burchfield came up was because Dave mentioned Kenny G as the record holder, when it wasn't. Once Dave mentioned Kenny G, a correction had to be provided.
4. I thought the name of the current record holder was information that could be left out. If I had more room on the card, I probably would have added it. Once I heard the name Kenny G mentioned during the show, I knew I was sunk.

For those keeping score at home, above I typed "Kenny G" 9 times.

I'm getting old and out of touch. I heard on the radio that the New York Rangers are going to retire #2. I thought it nice that they were going to pay tribute to former Ranger defensiveman, Brad Park. I only missed by 30 years. The Rangers are retiring Brian Leetch's #2.

After listening to Willie Nelson and Kenny Chesney last week on our show, it is more obvious to me than ever that New York is in dire need of a country/western music station. We have none. In fact, New York City radio is awful. We are forced to go satellite, either XM or Sirius, to find anything good. Some radio station should revisit the country/western format. The numbers may not be Top 5, but the station will get a real loyal following and likely do much better than what they are doing now.

Showtime is Saturday, September 8 at 11:30am - tickets are $6.00. Doors open at 11am, come early and hear pre-show music by Jeff Barker on the Lafayette Theatre's Mighty Wurlitzer Theatre Pipe Organ.

The new fall lineup is out for the Movie Classics at the Lafayette Theater in Suffern, New York. Each Saturday morning, the beautiful and historic theater showcases a classic. I try to make a few each year.
Here is the Fall line-up at the Lafayette:
September 8 - THE GREAT ESCAPE, starring Steve McQueen, James Garner, Charles Bronson, Richard Attenborough, and James Coburn
September 15 - THE PUBLIC ENEMY - James Cagney, Jean Harlow
September 16 - THE GENERAL - Silent Film Event - Buster Keaton in "The General" with live pipe organ accompaniment.
September 22 - ANCHORS AWEIGH - Gene Kelly, Frank Sinatra, Kathryn Grayson
September 29 - AFTER THE THIN MAN - William Powell, Myrna Loy, James Stewart
October 6 - Billy Wilder's ONE, TWO, THREE - James Cagney, Horst Bucholz, Arlene Francis
October 13 - Stanley Kubrick's THE KILLING - Sterling Hayden, Coleen Gray, Vince Edwards
October 27 - THE 7th VOYAGE OF SINBAD - Kerwin Mathews, Kathryn Grant - Special Visual Effects by Ray Harryhausen
November 3 - ALL THE KING'S MEN - Broderick Crawford, Joanne Dru, John Ireland
November 10 - TARZAN AND HIS MATE - Johnny Weissmuller, Maureen O'Sullivan - Original UNCUT version
November 17 - MY LITTLE CHICKADEE - W.C. Fields, Mae West
November 24 - Ian Fleming's GOLDFINGER - Sean Connery as James Bond - 007
December 1 - Alfred Hitchcock's THE LADY VANISHES - Margaret Lockwood, Michael Redgrave
December 8 - Stanley Donen's CHARADE - Cary Grant, Audrey Hepburn, Walter Matthau
December 15- Frank Capra's IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE - James Stewart, Donna Reed, Henry Travers - PLUS The Lafayette Theatre's Christmas Spectacular!

And so ends another issue of the Wahoo Gazette, the world's longest continuous-running blog on the internet . . . . oops, no it isn't.

CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
It's her 90th birthday on Sunday the 9th, from Noblesville, Indiana, it's Dorothy Rudy!
This concludes another installment of CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER