". . . . and now, early leader at the U.S. Open . . . . David Letterman!"

ACT 1
Stump the Band - It's America's fastest growing music sensation. Stump the Band is a little something we borrowed from Johnny Carson. Paul must have received the wrong memo because he was all prepared to participate in a different Carson signature piece: Carnac. In his Carnac hat, Paul holds an envelope up to his forehead and tells the answer to the question sealed inside.
The Answer: Mahmoud Amahdinejad. Paul opens the envelope to read the Question: "The sound Paula Abdul makes when tripping over her Chihuahua."

STP #1
Ken Vaught of Charlotte, North Carolina. He works in sales, selling friction products. Uhhh, what are friction products? Brake pads, transmission plates.
Anything else? Not really. That's about it. Ken is visiting NYC with his son who just graduated high school. Dave greets the new grad. I expected Dave to comment on his Beatle's length hair. Instead he sarcastically says to the lad, who remained seated, "Don't get up." The young high schooler was in a no-win situation. If he had gotten up, Dave would have told him to sit down.
Ken's song: "Down the Highway." Will Lee believes he knows the song. He sings. Good song, wrong song. Ken then gives his rendition. Halfway through the song we see a cutaway of the embarrassed son watching dad singing in a Broadway theater. Stephanie walks down the theater aisle to present Ken with a dinner for two.

STP #2
Megan Kriss of Weston, Florida. She is a student at Florida State University studying communications. What is she doing while visiting NYC? Megan doesn't really know. What are her plans for the next few days? She says she's going to Long Island. Dave says if she doesn't know what to do while in New York City, wait till she gets to Long Island.
Megan's song: "The Belly Button Song." Bruce Kapler knows the song, or so he claims. Bruce sings a song to the tune of The Who's "Squeezebox," but it's not the song we were looking for. Megan sings her Belly Button song and is rewarded with a dinner for two. Megan is here with her family so Dave says, "We'll increase that to a dinner for three, unless you have more from your family with you." A woman immediately in front of Megan quickly raises her hand, "Yes, I am." Obviously, she was not with Megan but was simply looking for a free meal. What made this funny was Megan is white; the woman in front of her was African American. I was amused at how her husband slinked down in his seat. Dave was impressed and amused with the woman's quick thinking.

STP #3
Sue Wiesman of Edgar, Wisconsin. Dave is familiar with Edgar and they talk about The Dells water skiing show. Sue is here with 46 of her friends. Yesterday they went to see Mama Mia and later tonight they were to see Jersey Boys. Tomorrow, they are going to the Yankee game. So in three days Sue and her friends are going to 2 Broadway shows, the Late Show, and to a Yankee/Met game. That's more than I've done in three years.
Sue's song: "We Are The Edgar Girls" - sounds like a fight song. Paul and the band sing a song to the tune of "We Are Family." It's not quite what Sue had in mind. Sue sings and she gets a dinner for two. I guess she can add that to her itinerary.

And that was Stump the Band.

ACT 2
More dinners to two couples in the audience; one dinner going to the woman who claimed to be a family member of Megan Kriss. Dave, making dreams come true. Dave wishes someone would give him a dinner. And in the shack, phone calls were immediately made.

Just because the school year is ending doesn't mean kids across the country have to stop learning. That's why we decided to bring back a popular segment, "Alan Kalter's Classroom Funhouse." Alan? Alan Kalter: "Thanks, Dave. Hey, kids! Today, my little friend Howie the Hamster (Alan points to area above his lap. There is no Howie the Hamster animation) and I are going to tell you the story of how Christopher Columbus discovered America! Won't that be interesting, Howie?" (Alan looks down at the Howie the Hamster animation that is not there) "Yeah? I'll begin. 'In fourteen hundred and ninety-two, Columbus sailed the ocean blue. He had three ships and left from Spain. He sailed through sunshine, wind and rain . . . ." (Alan looks off-screen to a stage manager. Alan breaks character and converses with an unseen/unheard stage manager) "Howie? What? There is no cartoon hamster?" (points to where hamster was supposed to be. Turns angry) "I was told there was going to be a cartoon hamster sitting on my lap right here. . . . . . oh, they're going to add it later? Well, that's just wonderful. You know, it's bad enough I have to sit here day in and day out, listening to Lieutenant Jackass over there (points to Day) bitching about his deviated septum, and now none of you brain-dead morons think to tell me for the past few minutes that I've basically been talking to my pants. Why don't you all take a big fat bite out of my ass?" An irate Alan throws his podium and storms out. Well, that turned ugly.

GREAT MOMENTS IN PRESIDENTIAL SPEECHES:
We see FDR. We see JFK. We see George W. Bush get excited when he says ". . . . went to a park in Botswana!" I may have seen the 20 times now and each time I laugh out loud. What a delivery.

ACT 3
THE WILD TURKEY BOURBON TURKEY GOBBLING CHAMPIONS - these are gobblers. A gobble is a mating call from a tom turkey.
#1. Preston Pittman of Petal, Mississippi; the 4th place finisher. Preston markets his own brand of turkey calls and lures. A gobble can work as a challenge to other turkeys to make him think another male is trying to next with his females. Dave summarizes, "So the gobble brings the birds out to ka-boom 'em." Preston's calls are so good he has had people shoot at him. Dave whimsies, "And how long have you known the Vice President?" Preston performs his call, an eastern turkey. I was very impressed. 4th place? I don't recall a better call on our program.

#2. Doug Benefield of Newnan, Georgia. He owns an automotive service center. Doug does his call equally as well as Preston's. I'll have to go back to some old shows to watch those turkey callers. I don't remember them being this good.

#3. Scott Wilhelm of Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin. He's the Grand Champion. Scott works as the manager of the hunting department at Scheel's All-Sports store back home. This excites Dave. To be a manager of a sporting department is every kid's dream. As a kid, Dave would spend hours in the sports department of his local store. Scott says, "I'm living your dream, Dave." Wow, that was very very funny. Two non-pros, Scott Wilhelm and the woman from Stump the Band who pretended to be with Megan Kriss.
Scott does his gobble; again to near perfection. I'm not even a turkey and I was attracted.

And that was our National Wild Turkey Bourbon Turkey Gobbling Champions.

ACT 4, 6
JOHN CUSACK: He's in the new horror film, "1408." John also had work done on a deviated septum. He suffered the injury when he was 12 years old breaking up a double play in baseball. It was fixed, but not perfect. Dave shares his pain, agreeing that doctors can never get it back exactly to where it was.
We just had the turkey gobblers. Does John do turkey calls or partake in competitions? John says he wasn't much of a speller in school so he never was involved in spelling bee competitions. He has been to barrooms and has found himself in competitions where people were trying to determine who could rid the world of the most alcohol. John doesn't involve himself in such competitions because he has noticed that fame and alcohol don't really mix.

John is from Chicago and is a big baseball fan. Is he a Cub fan or a White Sox fan? He's both. John loves both teams. But is that possible? Not to many Chicago baseball fans. Neither seems too pleased with him. John recently sang the traditional "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" at Wrigley Field recently in an inter-league game between the White Sox. He ended up being heckled by a White Sox fan.
I don't know how it is in Chicago, but here in New York it seems you are either a Yankee fan or a Met fan but not both. But there really isn't a hatred for the other team, either. It's closer to indifference. Of course there are those who love one and hate the other, but I don't sense all that much animosity towards each other. Maybe that'll change this weekend during the Yankee/Met 3-game series.

John's new film, "1408" opens June 22nd. It's a supernatural mindbender. We see a clip. Oooops! That wasn't the right clip. We saw an old black and white comical piece from an old-time movie. That's what we call Shecky footage. We then see the right clip.

ACT 5
It's the trio of turkey callers in the green room showing off their gobbles.

ACT 7
PINK MARTINI: From their new CD, "Hey Eugene," Pink Martini played the very satisfying "Hey Eugene."

And that was our show for Thursday, June 14, 2007.



I have a thing about numbers. You can usually make them do whatever you want if you work at it hard enough. So I look at the film title, "1408." I check the calendar. I shrug at what I found, wondering if I'm the only person who noticed these things.
"1408" - Couldn't they wait 6 months and open the film on January 4, 2008? January 4, 2008 is a Friday. It would be perfect --- 1/4/08 --- 1408. Gee whiz, am I the only one thinking around here?

I found something odd in the USA Today on Wednesday. It's odd, probably because I don't understand it. Can somebody explain this to me?

Wednesday's USA TODAY: Across The USA section.
New Hampshire: Concord - The state fined its own Transportation Department nearly $330,000 after employees, including supervisors, illegally dumped tons of lead paint chips, paint, and other contaminated debris. State officials say most of the dumping occurred at two department sites in Franklin. Transportation Commissioner Charles O'Leary said some employees already have been disciplined.

FLAG DAY - June 14th. From wikipedia:
Several men are claimed to have played early instrumental roles in the establishment of a National Flag Day.
Perhaps the most fervent claim dates to 1885, when a schoolteacher, Bernard J. Cigrand, reportedly urged the students at the public school in Waubek, Wisconsin to observe June 14 as "Flag Birthday." He moved to Chicago to attend dental school, and in June 1886 wrote an article titled "The Fourteenth of June" which was published in the Chicago Argus newspaper. He continued to promote the idea, and by June 1894, 300,000 children gathered in parks throughout Chicago to celebrate the day.
Another claim is made on behalf of William T. Kerr, a resident of Collie Township, Pennsylvania for a number of years, who founded the American Flag Day Association of Western Pennsylvania in 1888, became that organization's national chairman one year later, and served as such for fifty years. He attended President Harry S. Truman's 1949 signing of the Act of Congress which formally established the holiday. An older and less cited claim is in Kansas: a cyclopedia of state history, published by Standard Publishing Company (Chicago) in 1912. It credits George Morris of Hartford, Connecticut:
To George Morris of Hartford, Conn., is popularly given the credit of suggesting "Flag Day," the occasion being in honor of the adoption of the American flag on June 14, 1777. The city of Hartford observed the day in 1861, carrying out a program of a patriotic order, praying for the success of the Federal arms and the preservation of the Union.
Popular references
On the television show The Simpsons, Mr. Burns opens a fortune cookie which proclaims, "You will find true love on Flag Day."

And that's Flag Day.

I'm on Friday night. It was a last second thing put together during the show. Make sure to turn on your VCRs.

Still looking for a Father's Day gift? Check out the hot-selling CD, "Red Horizon" by Lathrop and Giller. Pick one up, maybe two. Your purchase will sure to bring a smile to someone's face.
To find out more about "Red Horizon," check out
http://tadlathrop.com/LathropGiller.html
Brian Howle recommends it!

Many in Thursday's audience are frequent visitors and contributors to the Letterman/Late Show newsgroup. They watch every show and then critique what they saw. And they don't hold back. If they didn't like something they are quick to say so. And if they like something, they are quick to applaud. They are a very knowledgeable crew and I myself have used them to gain information about the Late Show. Their visit last night to sit in the audience will surly be discussed in the newsgroup for a long time, longer than it should. If you want to check out the newsgroup, do the following:
1. go to google.
2. click on 'groups' (after clicking on 'more')
3. type in "letterman"
4. click on alt.fan.letterman
5. and you are now in the Late Show/Letterman newsgroup. The Late Show has nothing to do with this newsgroup and it often has inappropriate comments and topic not related to the show. Ignore them the best you can.
Enjoy.

And so ends another issue of the Wahoo Gazette, the world's longest continuous-running blog on the internet . . . . I think.

CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
From South Portland, Maine, it's Dan Page.
This concludes another installment of CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER