DAVETV If you could look at only one thing on the Internet, DaveTV would be the obvious choice. What other so-called "website" lets you watch LATE SHOW Highlights, Comedy Clips, Slideshows, Stupid Trick clips and The Tony Mendez Show?
TOP TEN LIST You know it, you love it, you can't live without it: the revolutionary comedy bit that won Dave the Nobel Peace Prize. Check out the latest Top Ten List here.
TOP TEN ARCHIVES Old Top Ten Lists never die, they just get archived. The Top Ten Archives is searchable by date and keyword. Also, please note that the word "archives" contains the word "chives."
TOP TEN CONTEST So you think you're as funny as Dave's writers? Or maybe you just enjoy wasting time at work? See if you've got the chops to win a great prize in our weekly Top Ten Contest.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
WAHOO GAZETTE LATE SHOW staffer Mike McIntee gives you a daily show summary and the behind-the-scenes lowdown with his daily Wahoo Gazette. So much juicy inside information that you'll say "Wahoo!"
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
Kevin Spacey; Ben Roethlisberger; and Streb. PLUS: Biscuits the Turkey; Daves
sandwich; something from Rubi; and the Late
Show Turkey Drop.
While billboarding the show,
Dave mistakenly identifies Kevin Spaceys
new film to be about James Darren, not Bobby
Darin. To the kid, it doesnt make much
difference.
I went home Tuesday night and watched a bit
of the LATE SHOW. There was something in the taping I was kind
of hoping would be edited out. It was near the top of the
show. The moment was approaching where Dave was billboarding
tonights performance of Streb. He was
looking for the info card on them. Damn. I see Barbara
quickly run over to put the card on his desk. Damn. Dave
reads the card . . . . and you saw the rest. He stumbled over
the wording. Whenever Dave stumbles over something when
reading from a blue card, my heart jumps to my throat. (Is that
the correct phrase?) Feeble and frightened, I then turn to
the page in the script to see if it was just a simple mis-speak
or if there was a typo. You cant imagine the relief
when I discover that it wasnt me. Tonight, dang it,
it was me. I made a typo. I made a mistake and all the world
was made aware. Not only did I make a typo but it was then
shown on the TV. What was the mistake? I dont
know. Something about Streb turning dance
into an extreme sport. When it was unfolding, I
couldnt look. Last night while watching it on the
TV, I still couldnt watch. I watched just enough to
see if it was in or not.
We say hello to
Rupert at the Hello Deli. Tonight on the agenda is
the LATE SHOW Turkey Drop. Dave instructs Rupert
to go outside, find a contestant and take her or her to the roof
of the Ed Sullivan Theater.
Did you read where
someone sold a grilled cheese sandwich on Ebay for $28,000
because it reportedly had the image of the Virgin Mary on it?
Well coincidentally, Dave bought a sandwich at Ruperts
for lunch today and, lo and behold, right there on the toasted
white was the image of Burt Reynolds.
Its sure to pick up a $100 on Ebay.
Last week
President Bush continued a White House tradition
when he pardoned a turkey named Biscuits.
This turned out to be a mistake. Osama released another one
of his video messages today:
The defection of Biscuits the turkey marks a
great victory for our jihad! You are a fool, Bush. I tell you
there are millions of Al Qaeda sympathizers among American
poultry. I call upon the faithful, whether they be men or
plump, juicy birds, to bring death to America!
SPANISH SOAP OPERA OF THE
NIGHT: From Telemundos Rubi, we
see an exciting poolside scene of two young, pretty women in a
verbal spat that turns an Indiana Pacer/Detroit Piston
basketball game. Slaps are exchanged and one is thrown into
the pool.
Back to Rupert and his contestant. He is
with Karen from Alabama. Karen will
have 3 attempts to drop a fake turkey into a tub of gravy
awaiting on the sidewalk of West 53rd Street. The roof is 90
feet up. The tub of gravy is 26 inches in diameter.
Weather conditions: Temperature 53 degrees Humidity 83% Barometric
Pressure 30.10 inches and rising Wind calm Visibility 9 miles
I gulped
hard when Dave read the visibility as 9 miles per
hour. DID I TYPE THAT, TOO? I
painfully turned to the page in the script which had the weather
conditions and it read . . . . . . . 9
miles. It wasnt me. Phew.
And
what are we playing for tonight? Its a Krups
Waffle Chef Belgian Waffle Maker.
Karen takes
aim with her fake turkey. Looking, aiming, looking, looking,
aiming, she is now ready. Karen releases the fake turkey and
it . . . . misses by inches, just to the left of the mark.
Karen takes another fake turkey. She aims, looks, aims,
aims, looks, looks and releases. The fake turkey falls to 53rd
Street at the rate of 32 feet per second second . . . . I never
knew what that meant . . . . and the fake turkey . . . . . .
BINGO! Its a hit! Bullseye! Congratulations,
Karen. Nice going. And for her efforts, Karen wins a Krups
Belgian Waffle Maker and a Hello Deli deli platter.
Dave notices the Hello Deli deli platter was kind of
skimpy. There wasnt much to it tonight. Rupert
sheepishly agrees, admitting, Yeah, I know. I
didnt have much time today.
Theres not a night that goes by where
Ruperts sweet innocence and honesty doesnt
make me laugh.
Dave decides to let Rupert in on the
fun. He instructs Rupert to let the Hello Deli deli platter
fly down to the tub of gravy. Rupert takes his deli platter
and releases. The deli platter flutters groundward and it . . .
. misses the mark, landing just to the left of the tub of
gravy. We take a close up of the Hello Deli deli platter and
discover that the meat slices and cheese slices and even the
tomato in the center did not budge in the slightest. As it
looked in Ruperts hands seconds ago, it looks exactly
the same now lying flat on 53rd Street. Not a piece has been
altered, as if each slice had been crazy-glued in its place.
Very funny image, and quite unexplainable. Dave said earlier
while reading the weather conditions that the face that the wind
was calm was probably the most important
thing. I didnt think the wind would affect the
flight of the fake turkeys, but when the deli platter was
dropped I fully expected even the slightest wind to take it
flittering and fluttering and tumble-saulting on its way to the
ground. That didnt happen. The platter floated down
softly, remaining perfectly flat the whole way. It landed just
the way it was dropped.
Live, unscripted TV. Now
that was fun!
KEVIN SPACEY: Hes
stars, co-wrote, and directed Beyond the Sea, the
biopic of singer Bobby Darin.
Kevin was excited to play
this role, having been familiar with his music since childhood.
His mother loved Bobby Darin and Kevin as a child spent many
hours singing his songs into a hair brush. Kevin mentions that
Bobbys ventured into all types of music, successful in
all. When Kevin said he wanted to perform the songs himself,
the family of Bobby Darin would not allow it. Once they met
Kevin, learned his heart was in the right place, and that Kevin
could actually sing, they relented. A CD of Bobby
Darins music, sung by Kevin, entitled Beyond the
Sea original motion picture soundtrack, was released just
today. Those in the LATE SHOW research department gave it a
strong thumbs up. About the CD, Kevin says, I did
something today I never thought I would do. I did a CD
signing at a Barnes and Nobel. Kevin tells an
amusing story about being at the Clinton Library Dedication.
Also there was Bono of U2. Bono
leans over to Kevin, pulls out the new U2/Bono CD and says,
Here. This is for you. Its just coming
out. Kevin was pleased, and then realized . . . . .
hey, I got one for you too, and handed Bono
his Beyond the Sea CD.
Whenever I walk
into a new bar that is tending to an older set, the song I
usually will put on the juke box is Bobby Darins
Beyond the Sea. It is the flip side to
Mack the Knife.
BEN
ROETHLISBERGER: rookie quarterback for the Pittsburgh
Steelers. He set a quarterback record by winning his first 8
games to start a career. The intro said he set an NFL record
for most wins by a rookie starting quarterback. I
wasnt sure if this was right. I checked Dan
Marinos Dolphins of 1983 and found they were
12-4. Marino came in about 4 games into the season. He lost
his first game but went 9-1 the rest of the way. I was told
later that he missed the final two games that year, so his win
total was 7 his rookie season. Has a quarterback won more than
8 games in his rookie season? Ben played his college ball at
Miami of Ohio, a member of the Mid-American Conference. He
left with one year of eligibility remaining. Last year he
defeated Daves Ball State, 49-3. The score
wasnt as bad as it sounds. The game was tied early.
So if Ben Roethlisberger was so good, why did he go to Miami of
Ohio and not one of those big big-time football college
factories? For one, he didnt play quarterback until
his senior year in high school. Yikes! The guy is a quick
learner. The difference between college and the Pros? Speed.
Everything is so much faster in the pros.
Hazing for
the rookie? During training camp he had to get up and sing
his school song. For the morning meetings he was responsible
for bringing the donuts. If the meeting was in the afternoon,
it was Popeyes. Hmmm. I wonder if he tried the green beans?
ACT 5: The Quarterback Challenge on Broadway.
As taxi cabs drive by, Dave and Ben try to throw a football
through the back window. Each went 0-4. We keep trying to
recapture the magic of Dave, Joe Montana, and
Cybill Sheperd throwing a football through the same
taxi cab of so many years ago. Ill have to go back
to the video tape because I picture the cabs back then going
slower and being closer. Plus, I think the front windows were
also open. I remember this because I drove one of the cabs for
Dave, Joe and Cybill.
STREB: - 6
performers - tonights performance is
entitled Ricochet. - Streb makes
Dance an extreme sport - Streb
performers have suffered broken feet, arms, fingers, toes, and
noses. - Check out their website at
www.strebusa.org. - Its not
dance, its Pop Action! We
see the 6 performers running up against a clear Plexiglas wall.
It reminded me of Maxwell Smarts apartment.
And that was our show for Tuesday November 23,
2004.Wahoo
EXTRA! Its that
time of year again and its a tradition at the
Wahoo Gazette --- its the
Wahoo Gazette Rudolph the Red Nosed
Reindeer/Herbie vs. Hermey debate. Actually,
the debate is pretty much dead but I like to bring it up once a
year. The elf who wants to be a dentist in the Rudolph TV
special is named Hermey, but you will see him
referred to as Herbie in enough places to create
question. Im forever looking for more
Herbies. I have a few coloring books and
a story book at home that call him Herbie, but I have been told
many times, with direct reference to the creator of the elf
himself, that it is indeed Hermey. So there will be no debate
this year. What I will report are any incorrect spottings of
Herbie the elf. Let me know if you see
any. Oh, the Rudolph special is on next week on CBS,
Wednesday December 1st. If you listen closely, the
first time the head elf says the name of the dentist elf, it
does sound a lot like Herbie. Watch and
listen.
Ever notice how the guilty are so quick to say
how they want to get this all behind us and
to move on. When I hear that, an alarm
goes off in my head. (Or maybe its just my banging
hangover.) I was listening to the fan who threw the beer at
Ron Artest saying how he wished we could put all
this behind us.. In the interview I saw, he was wearing a hat
and sunglasses. I thought I heard the announcer say he also
shaved his mustache from the night before. Nut job. I saw
the replay of the incident in Detroit. Not only were you able
to see the guy throwing the cup of beer/soda/water, afterwards
when he was trying to pull Ron Artest off someone, he snuck a
few punches in himself.
Congratulations to the
Toronto Argonauts for their winning the Canadian
Football Leagues Grey Cup, defeating the British
Columbia Lions, 27-19. The Grey Cup is the Canadas
Super Bowl. Or maybe I should say Our Super Bowl is
their Grey Cup since the Grey Cup has been around for
92 years. The Super Bowl has only been around for XXXVII
years.
And why is it called The Grey
Cup? Who is this Grey? - The
Grey Cup is named for Lord Albert Henry Earl Grey,
Governor-General of Canada, who donated the trophy in 1909
Did you watch the American Girl Doll movie on
the WB last night? It was the Samantha episode, New York 1904.
My girls watched it and I joined in as soon as I got home. We
all enjoyed it, even though we knew the ending already, having
seen the show LIVE at the American Girl Doll store on 5th Avenue
and 49th Street. Lets hope another movie is made
with Kit or Molly.
If you missed it, you can catch the
replay on Thanksgiving night.
Kevin Spacey; Ben Roethlisberger; and Streb. PLUS: Biscuits the Turkey; Daves
sandwich; something from Rubi; and the Late
Show Turkey Drop.
While billboarding the show,
Dave mistakenly identifies Kevin Spaceys
new film to be about James Darren, not Bobby
Darin. To the kid, it doesnt make much
difference.
I went home Tuesday night and watched a bit
of the LATE SHOW. There was something in the taping I was kind
of hoping would be edited out. It was near the top of the
show. The moment was approaching where Dave was billboarding
tonights performance of Streb. He was
looking for the info card on them. Damn. I see Barbara
quickly run over to put the card on his desk. Damn. Dave
reads the card . . . . and you saw the rest. He stumbled over
the wording. Whenever Dave stumbles over something when
reading from a blue card, my heart jumps to my throat. (Is that
the correct phrase?) Feeble and frightened, I then turn to
the page in the script to see if it was just a simple mis-speak
or if there was a typo. You cant imagine the relief
when I discover that it wasnt me. Tonight, dang it,
it was me. I made a typo. I made a mistake and all the world
was made aware. Not only did I make a typo but it was then
shown on the TV. What was the mistake? I dont
know. Something about Streb turning dance
into an extreme sport. When it was unfolding, I
couldnt look. Last night while watching it on the
TV, I still couldnt watch. I watched just enough to
see if it was in or not.
We say hello to
Rupert at the Hello Deli. Tonight on the agenda is
the LATE SHOW Turkey Drop. Dave instructs Rupert
to go outside, find a contestant and take her or her to the roof
of the Ed Sullivan Theater.
Did you read where
someone sold a grilled cheese sandwich on Ebay for $28,000
because it reportedly had the image of the Virgin Mary on it?
Well coincidentally, Dave bought a sandwich at Ruperts
for lunch today and, lo and behold, right there on the toasted
white was the image of Burt Reynolds.
Its sure to pick up a $100 on Ebay.
Last week
President Bush continued a White House tradition
when he pardoned a turkey named Biscuits.
This turned out to be a mistake. Osama released another one
of his video messages today:
The defection of Biscuits the turkey marks a
great victory for our jihad! You are a fool, Bush. I tell you
there are millions of Al Qaeda sympathizers among American
poultry. I call upon the faithful, whether they be men or
plump, juicy birds, to bring death to America!
SPANISH SOAP OPERA OF THE
NIGHT: From Telemundos Rubi, we
see an exciting poolside scene of two young, pretty women in a
verbal spat that turns an Indiana Pacer/Detroit Piston
basketball game. Slaps are exchanged and one is thrown into
the pool.
Back to Rupert and his contestant. He is
with Karen from Alabama. Karen will
have 3 attempts to drop a fake turkey into a tub of gravy
awaiting on the sidewalk of West 53rd Street. The roof is 90
feet up. The tub of gravy is 26 inches in diameter.
Weather conditions: Temperature 53 degrees Humidity 83% Barometric
Pressure 30.10 inches and rising Wind calm Visibility 9 miles
I gulped
hard when Dave read the visibility as 9 miles per
hour. DID I TYPE THAT, TOO? I
painfully turned to the page in the script which had the weather
conditions and it read . . . . . . . 9
miles. It wasnt me. Phew.
And
what are we playing for tonight? Its a Krups
Waffle Chef Belgian Waffle Maker.
Karen takes
aim with her fake turkey. Looking, aiming, looking, looking,
aiming, she is now ready. Karen releases the fake turkey and
it . . . . misses by inches, just to the left of the mark.
Karen takes another fake turkey. She aims, looks, aims,
aims, looks, looks and releases. The fake turkey falls to 53rd
Street at the rate of 32 feet per second second . . . . I never
knew what that meant . . . . and the fake turkey . . . . . .
BINGO! Its a hit! Bullseye! Congratulations,
Karen. Nice going. And for her efforts, Karen wins a Krups
Belgian Waffle Maker and a Hello Deli deli platter.
Dave notices the Hello Deli deli platter was kind of
skimpy. There wasnt much to it tonight. Rupert
sheepishly agrees, admitting, Yeah, I know. I
didnt have much time today.
Theres not a night that goes by where
Ruperts sweet innocence and honesty doesnt
make me laugh.
Dave decides to let Rupert in on the
fun. He instructs Rupert to let the Hello Deli deli platter
fly down to the tub of gravy. Rupert takes his deli platter
and releases. The deli platter flutters groundward and it . . .
. misses the mark, landing just to the left of the tub of
gravy. We take a close up of the Hello Deli deli platter and
discover that the meat slices and cheese slices and even the
tomato in the center did not budge in the slightest. As it
looked in Ruperts hands seconds ago, it looks exactly
the same now lying flat on 53rd Street. Not a piece has been
altered, as if each slice had been crazy-glued in its place.
Very funny image, and quite unexplainable. Dave said earlier
while reading the weather conditions that the face that the wind
was calm was probably the most important
thing. I didnt think the wind would affect the
flight of the fake turkeys, but when the deli platter was
dropped I fully expected even the slightest wind to take it
flittering and fluttering and tumble-saulting on its way to the
ground. That didnt happen. The platter floated down
softly, remaining perfectly flat the whole way. It landed just
the way it was dropped.
Live, unscripted TV. Now
that was fun!
KEVIN SPACEY: Hes
stars, co-wrote, and directed Beyond the Sea, the
biopic of singer Bobby Darin.
Kevin was excited to play
this role, having been familiar with his music since childhood.
His mother loved Bobby Darin and Kevin as a child spent many
hours singing his songs into a hair brush. Kevin mentions that
Bobbys ventured into all types of music, successful in
all. When Kevin said he wanted to perform the songs himself,
the family of Bobby Darin would not allow it. Once they met
Kevin, learned his heart was in the right place, and that Kevin
could actually sing, they relented. A CD of Bobby
Darins music, sung by Kevin, entitled Beyond the
Sea original motion picture soundtrack, was released just
today. Those in the LATE SHOW research department gave it a
strong thumbs up. About the CD, Kevin says, I did
something today I never thought I would do. I did a CD
signing at a Barnes and Nobel. Kevin tells an
amusing story about being at the Clinton Library Dedication.
Also there was Bono of U2. Bono
leans over to Kevin, pulls out the new U2/Bono CD and says,
Here. This is for you. Its just coming
out. Kevin was pleased, and then realized . . . . .
hey, I got one for you too, and handed Bono
his Beyond the Sea CD.
Whenever I walk
into a new bar that is tending to an older set, the song I
usually will put on the juke box is Bobby Darins
Beyond the Sea. It is the flip side to
Mack the Knife.
BEN
ROETHLISBERGER: rookie quarterback for the Pittsburgh
Steelers. He set a quarterback record by winning his first 8
games to start a career. The intro said he set an NFL record
for most wins by a rookie starting quarterback. I
wasnt sure if this was right. I checked Dan
Marinos Dolphins of 1983 and found they were
12-4. Marino came in about 4 games into the season. He lost
his first game but went 9-1 the rest of the way. I was told
later that he missed the final two games that year, so his win
total was 7 his rookie season. Has a quarterback won more than
8 games in his rookie season? Ben played his college ball at
Miami of Ohio, a member of the Mid-American Conference. He
left with one year of eligibility remaining. Last year he
defeated Daves Ball State, 49-3. The score
wasnt as bad as it sounds. The game was tied early.
So if Ben Roethlisberger was so good, why did he go to Miami of
Ohio and not one of those big big-time football college
factories? For one, he didnt play quarterback until
his senior year in high school. Yikes! The guy is a quick
learner. The difference between college and the Pros? Speed.
Everything is so much faster in the pros.
Hazing for
the rookie? During training camp he had to get up and sing
his school song. For the morning meetings he was responsible
for bringing the donuts. If the meeting was in the afternoon,
it was Popeyes. Hmmm. I wonder if he tried the green beans?
ACT 5: The Quarterback Challenge on Broadway.
As taxi cabs drive by, Dave and Ben try to throw a football
through the back window. Each went 0-4. We keep trying to
recapture the magic of Dave, Joe Montana, and
Cybill Sheperd throwing a football through the same
taxi cab of so many years ago. Ill have to go back
to the video tape because I picture the cabs back then going
slower and being closer. Plus, I think the front windows were
also open. I remember this because I drove one of the cabs for
Dave, Joe and Cybill.
STREB: - 6
performers - tonights performance is
entitled Ricochet. - Streb makes
Dance an extreme sport - Streb
performers have suffered broken feet, arms, fingers, toes, and
noses. - Check out their website at
www.strebusa.org. - Its not
dance, its Pop Action! We
see the 6 performers running up against a clear Plexiglas wall.
It reminded me of Maxwell Smarts apartment.
And that was our show for Tuesday November 23,
2004.Wahoo
EXTRA! Its that
time of year again and its a tradition at the
Wahoo Gazette --- its the
Wahoo Gazette Rudolph the Red Nosed
Reindeer/Herbie vs. Hermey debate. Actually,
the debate is pretty much dead but I like to bring it up once a
year. The elf who wants to be a dentist in the Rudolph TV
special is named Hermey, but you will see him
referred to as Herbie in enough places to create
question. Im forever looking for more
Herbies. I have a few coloring books and
a story book at home that call him Herbie, but I have been told
many times, with direct reference to the creator of the elf
himself, that it is indeed Hermey. So there will be no debate
this year. What I will report are any incorrect spottings of
Herbie the elf. Let me know if you see
any. Oh, the Rudolph special is on next week on CBS,
Wednesday December 1st. If you listen closely, the
first time the head elf says the name of the dentist elf, it
does sound a lot like Herbie. Watch and
listen.
Ever notice how the guilty are so quick to say
how they want to get this all behind us and
to move on. When I hear that, an alarm
goes off in my head. (Or maybe its just my banging
hangover.) I was listening to the fan who threw the beer at
Ron Artest saying how he wished we could put all
this behind us.. In the interview I saw, he was wearing a hat
and sunglasses. I thought I heard the announcer say he also
shaved his mustache from the night before. Nut job. I saw
the replay of the incident in Detroit. Not only were you able
to see the guy throwing the cup of beer/soda/water, afterwards
when he was trying to pull Ron Artest off someone, he snuck a
few punches in himself.
Congratulations to the
Toronto Argonauts for their winning the Canadian
Football Leagues Grey Cup, defeating the British
Columbia Lions, 27-19. The Grey Cup is the Canadas
Super Bowl. Or maybe I should say Our Super Bowl is
their Grey Cup since the Grey Cup has been around for
92 years. The Super Bowl has only been around for XXXVII
years.
And why is it called The Grey
Cup? Who is this Grey? - The
Grey Cup is named for Lord Albert Henry Earl Grey,
Governor-General of Canada, who donated the trophy in 1909
Did you watch the American Girl Doll movie on
the WB last night? It was the Samantha episode, New York 1904.
My girls watched it and I joined in as soon as I got home. We
all enjoyed it, even though we knew the ending already, having
seen the show LIVE at the American Girl Doll store on 5th Avenue
and 49th Street. Lets hope another movie is made
with Kit or Molly.
If you missed it, you can catch the
replay on Thanksgiving night.