After billboarding the show, Dave has some nice words about Rodney Dangerfield, who sadly passed away yesterday. Dave was reminded that back at the old show in 1984, Rodney’s son Brian Roy interned on LATE NIGHT. Dave says about Rodney that there was nothing tricky about Rodney. You knew what you were going to get. Jokes. Funny, hilarious jokes. The guy would step on stage and you were laughing before he even said a word. What Rodney did, NOBODY did better.

CNN IDIOT OF THE NIGHT: Before the debate last night at Case Western Reserve University in Cleveland, Ohio, CNN’s Wolf Blitzer was giving his views on what to expect. Behind him, far far behind him, was a student dancing like an idiot hoping to get on TV. He succeeded. It reminded me of something I would do back in college.

NEW TEXT BOOKS
Before showing some of today’s new text books, Dave reads from a stack of papers containing Rodney Dangerfield jokes. He read most, skipping some. The way Dave was reading the Rodney Dangerfield Jokes and skimming over some here and there reminded me a lot of how Johnny would do the same.

I was running to and fro and then back to “to” again and I missed all of the ACT 1. Earlier in the day I wrote the end half of today’s Wahoo and said my piece about Rodney. I added a whole bunch of Rodney jokes. I figured this would be a nice tribute, but more important, this would also take up a lot of Wahoo space and give me an easy day at the computer. Therefore, if you want to read a bunch of Rodney jokes, some of which Dave read on the show tonight, skip to the bottom of the Wahoo. I did the jokes first and I ain’t giving up what I already did.

After reading a slew of Rodney jokes, Dave had no time left over to do Text Books. They may pop up again soon.

TOP TEN: Thoughts Going Through Dick Cheney’s Mind At This Point – from last night’s debate vs. John Edwards.
#9. “Hopefully he won’t mention Hallibur - - - oh, crap!”
#7. “Where’s the girl with my Jack and Coke?”
#5. “Good God, it’s true. Edwards is devastatingly handsome.”
#2. “That was the cue to bring out Osama! Where the hell is he?”

JAMIE FOXX: His film, Ray is near the top of my list of movies I want to see . . . if I ever went to movies. I love the Ray Charles movie and I’ve heard Jamie gives a masterful performance. Dave says the more he sees of Jamie’s work, the more he’s impressed.
That’s all I got. During the Jamie Foxx segment, I was typing up stuff for Rothbart and stuff for later in the show.

Into commercial, Paul and the band perform Ray Charles’ “What’d I Say.” Can’t sit still when I hear that beat.

DAVY ROTHBART: creator of the “Found” magazine and author of the book, Found: The Best Lost, Tossed, and Forgotten Items from Around the World. This guy has been on the show before. His hobby, which he’s turned into a career, is looking for and finding odd notes and things of interest. He puts out a magazine a few times a year of his findings and has taken his best discoveries and put them into a book. His book is doing very well and is currently on a 136-city tour, visiting all 50 states. During the tour he’s been living out of a 1999 Dodge Van.

Davy brought along some of his more interesting notes he found in his travels.
1. No touchy! No bumpy, No movy, No Nuthin’” – he found this one on a recent trip to Alaska.
2. Another letter from a kid telling his mom he’ll be at Gimpy’s place. “Don’t call and yell, yell at me tonight.” He wants to have a good New Years.
3. A guy kept a budget list. Some things found on the monthly ledger: Rent - 600. Telephone – 50; Cell Phone – 50. Liquor; Crack – 600
4. A love letter from a gal to her “boyfriend.” Halfway through, it read, “Things haven’t been the same since we found out we were related.”
5. A “Closed” sign – “It’s my grandmothers 100 birthday and there’s a raccoon in my bathroom.”
6. A simple note which reads, “Took some ho’s to get some burritos.”
7. A letter complaining that the recipient should stop doing “that thing you do. It’s not kinky . . . it’s sick.” It goes on to say the behavior is “damaging our sex life.”
8. A sign that was placed on a door: “After leaving the building, please lock this door. It will prevent unauthorized people from entering the building and defecating in the washing machine. Many thanks.”

Lucky for Davy. Just before the start of his tour, he found a great pair of sneakers that were adorned with 50 stars. Now after he’s visited each state, he simply darkens in the stars. He’s half way there.

I find Davy Rothbart oddly entertaining. I’ve got to get a look at that book. Looks like a nice Christmas gift for the guys at the Volunteer Firehouse.

On Davy Rothbart’s entrance, Paul played “Pick Up The Pieces” by the Average White Band. The same song can be heard in the Queen Latifah film, “Taxi.” It was a big hit back in my high school days. In fact, I have it going around on my record player this very minute.

ACT 5: “Tonight’s episode of the LATE SHOW was brought to you by Taco Bell. Taco Bell! Take some ho’s to get some burritos.
We’ll be right back.”

THE KILLERS: From their CD, Hot Fuss, The Killers performed “Somebody Told Me.”

“I call you killer . . . because you slaaaaaayyyy me.”

Tomorrow on the show, Donald Trump, X Prize pilot Brian Binnie, and a song from Minnie Driver. Dave excitedly says, “And do you know what you’d get if Minnie Driver married Brian Binnie? Minnie Binnie.” Paul doesn’t seem as impressed. I liked it and I have a feeling I’ll be saying Minnie Binnie all day Thursday.

And that was our show for Wednesday October 6, 2004. Wahoo EXTRA!

It’s new, it’s WAHOO ENTERMATION: Not only entertainment, but informational.
THE HISTORY OF CHEERIOS
Cheerios was originally introduced as CheeriOats in 1941, by General Mills, and marketed as the first oat-based ready-to-eat without cooking cereal. From its inception, General Mills attempted to make American culture and breakfast synonymous with CheeriOats. After changing the name to Cheerios in 1945, General Mills continued to employ aggressive marketing techniques to sell Cheerios. America’s focus centered on World War II, and the marketing techniques employed by General Mills during this time period reflect the social situations. Cheerios mascot, Cheeri O’ Leary, proclaimed the value of Cheerios, “suggesting seven nutritious ‘fighting breakfasts’ built around CheeriOats”. Strong marketing techniques proved successful, as CheeriOats sold 1.8 million cases in its first full year, (www.cheerios.com). These basic premises, strong marketing techniques associated with American culture and aimed at young consumers, continued to define General Mills and Cheerios for the entire 20th century

Rats! My all-time favorite standup comedian Mr. Rodney Dangerfield has passed away. He was one of only two guests on Johnny Carson’s Tonight Show that I would make sure not to miss. Rodney was one. The other was Stan Cann, a guy who would bring and demonstrate new gizmos that are on the market. (Think Jack Hanna with new inventions.) Johnny was great with Rodney. He would expertly ask a list of questions for Rodney, who would then go off on his rat-a-tat spiel, firing off joke after joke after joke, too fast for me to write down or remember. It was the absolute best entertainment for me. Jokes. Just jokes, fast and furious.

* I come from a stupid family. During the civil war my great uncle fought for the West!

* My father was stupid. He worked in a bank and they caught him stealing pens.

* When I was born..the doctor came out to the waiting room and said to my father.. "I'm very sorry. We did everything we could..but he pulled through."

* My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend.

* My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.

* When I played in the sandbox the cat kept covering me up.

* I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.

* Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt because he leaves a pyramid in every room.

* What a dog I got. His favorite bone is in my arm!

* I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent back a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof!

* Once when I was lost.. I saw a policeman and asked him to help me find my parents. I said to him.."Do you think we'll ever find them." He said.."I don't know kid.. there are so many places they can hide."

* I remember I was so depressed I was going to jump out a window on the tenth floor.. so they sent a priest up to talk to me. He said, "On your mark..."

* I had a lot of pimples too. One day I fell asleep in a library. I woke up and a blind man was reading my face.

* Last week my tie caught on fire. Some guy tried to put it out with an axe!

* A girl phoned me and said.."Come on over there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home!

* I went to message parlor. It was self service.

* I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said... "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said.. "No.. I hate myself now."

* During sex my wife always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel.

* One day..as I came home early from work.. I saw a guy jogging naked. I said to the guy.."Hey buddy..why are you doing that for?" He said.. "Because you came home early."

* I went to look for a used car. I found my wife's dress in the back seat!

* I went to see my doctor. I told him once.. "Doctor.. every morning when I get up and look in the mirror..I feel like throwing up; what's wrong with me?" He said.."I don't know but your eyesight is perfect."

* I remember when I swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. He told me to have a few drinks and get some rest.

* I told my doctor I think my wife has VD. He gave himself a shot of penicillin.

* Why every time he smokes..he blows onion rings.

* My physchiatrist told me I'm going crazy. I told him.. "If you don't mind I'd like a second opion. "He said.."Alright..you're ugly too."

* Last week I saw my psychiatrist. I told him, “Doc, I keep thinking I’m a dog.” He told me to get off the couch.

* Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home.

* I asked my old man if I could go ice skating on the lake. He told me, “Wait till it gets warmer.”

* I met the surgeon general. He offered me a cigarette.

I hear they’re burying him face down.