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Friday, February 15, 2008

Top Ten Signs You Had A Bad Valentine's Day
 Top Ten   
You got a ticket to Hawaii. Unfortunately, it's a bus ticket
There was hanky, but no panky
It was just you, your date, and his parole officer
Only person you saw naked was your mother-in-law
You found out your date "Sherry" was really "Gary"
Night ended with you vomiting in a Red Lobster parking lot
Instead of cupid, you were shot by a Latin King as a part of a gang initiation
Somehow you ended up in a Mexican prison
During a moment of candelit passion, your hairpiece caught fire
When your dinner came out, so did your husband
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Open your eyes to see Richard Simmons' spangled shorts on your bedroom floor

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He knitted you a sweater out of his back hair

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His gift? Let you keep the change when he gave you a buck to buy him USA TODAY

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"Stretch limo" turned out to be a Hyundai pulled by a towtruck

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Store name on the jewelry box is "Everything is 99 cents"

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The "gift" she gave you causes itching and burning

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