DAVETV If you could look at only one thing on the Internet, DaveTV would be the obvious choice. What other so-called "website" lets you watch LATE SHOW Highlights, Comedy Clips, Slideshows, Stupid Trick clips and The Tony Mendez Show?
TOP TEN LIST You know it, you love it, you can't live without it: the revolutionary comedy bit that won Dave the Nobel Peace Prize. Check out the latest Top Ten List here.
TOP TEN ARCHIVES Old Top Ten Lists never die, they just get archived. The Top Ten Archives is searchable by date and keyword. Also, please note that the word "archives" contains the word "chives."
TOP TEN CONTEST So you think you're as funny as Dave's writers? Or maybe you just enjoy wasting time at work? See if you've got the chops to win a great prize in our weekly Top Ten Contest.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
WAHOO GAZETTE LATE SHOW staffer Mike McIntee gives you a daily show summary and the behind-the-scenes lowdown with his daily Wahoo Gazette. So much juicy inside information that you'll say "Wahoo!"
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Top Ten Signs You've Eaten Tainted Lettuce
It tasted E. coli-y
You had to sign a waiver before a trip to the Olive Garden
salad bar
It comes with penicillin vinaigrette
Most people don't bleed spontaneously after eating a BLT
Only respond when someone says, "Here kitty, kitty, kitty..."
Flip on CNN to see headline "Deadly Lettuce" and
a photo of your house
You test a nuclear weapon in open defiance of the
international community
All of your produce is bought from Tainted Valley Farms
On a hunting trip, you mistake an elderly lawyer for a quail
You feel weak and listless and your name's not "A-Rod"
·
You find yourself thinking "That Dennis Hastert is a
fine-looking hunk of a man"
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Your salad just bit you
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You look in the mirror, the Hulk looks back
·
You're the only one at the salad bar not wearing a Hazmat suit
·
First time buying radicchio where you had to sign a waiver
Brad Garrett's Bad Golf Day Ray Romano provides commentary for Brad's record-setting round of golf.
