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Thursday, June 29, 2006

Top Ten Signs The Supreme Court Doesn't Give A Damn
  
Opinion based on coin flip so they could make 2:40 showing of "Superman Returns"
Tough to concentrate with Ruth Bader Ginsburg trying on bikinis
Spent last two days hearing arguments between Barbara Walters and Star Jones
All gavels make crazy "boing" sound
Recesses now take place at area Hooters
Chief Justice John Roberts demands to be called "J. Ro"
After heated debate, ruled 7-to-2 that Aerosmith does indeed rock
Upheld gay marriage, but only for really hot babes
For kicks they reversed an old decision and now Gore's President
Invited Anna Nicole Smith back to stand around and look slutty
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Sorry, no Top Ten Extras tonight!

Olympic Volleyball Gold Medalists, Kerri Walsh & Misty May-Treanor
In their full interview, the Olympic champs talk about Beijing, bikinis and Bush.
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Augustana (II)
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Rogen's Jump
Just in time for the Olympics, a fully-clothed Seth Rogen tries to outjump the diving dogs.
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