DAVETV If you could look at only one thing on the Internet, DaveTV would be the obvious choice. What other so-called "website" lets you watch LATE SHOW Highlights, Comedy Clips, Slideshows, Stupid Trick clips and The Tony Mendez Show?
TOP TEN LIST You know it, you love it, you can't live without it: the revolutionary comedy bit that won Dave the Nobel Peace Prize. Check out the latest Top Ten List here.
TOP TEN ARCHIVES Old Top Ten Lists never die, they just get archived. The Top Ten Archives is searchable by date and keyword. Also, please note that the word "archives" contains the word "chives."
TOP TEN CONTEST So you think you're as funny as Dave's writers? Or maybe you just enjoy wasting time at work? See if you've got the chops to win a great prize in our weekly Top Ten Contest.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
WAHOO GAZETTE LATE SHOW staffer Mike McIntee gives you a daily show summary and the behind-the-scenes lowdown with his daily Wahoo Gazette. So much juicy inside information that you'll say "Wahoo!"
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
Monday, January 23, 2006
Top Ten Signs Your Neighbor Is A Vampire
Once a week a Domino's guy enters, and doesn't leave
Claims his back never felt better since switching to Sealy
Posturepedic coffin
Always seems sad when you wear a turtleneck
You see him getting stake in the crotch on Transylvania's
Funniest Home Videos
He's lived in that house since 1783
Opens can of Hawaiian Punch with his teeth
When you bring up the 200 bucks he owes you, he turns into
a bat and flies away
Comes home from Sam's Club with a picnic-sized container
of human blood
Well, there's the "Vampires Do It Upside Down"
bumper sticker
He's pale and creepy, but he ain't Michael Jackson
·
On garbage day, leaves bloodless carcasses by the curb
·
When you're shaving, he sits on edge of your tub with a
napkin tucked into his shirt just in case
·
You answer the door, Wolfman takes a look at you and says,
"Sorry dude, wrong house"
·
His name? Dick Cheney
·
Invites you over and asks, "What'll you have - A+?
Type O?"
·
Feeds off the living, drains them of everything they have,
and then moves to his next victim. Oh sorry, that's top ten
signs your neighbor is a lawyer
"Late Show" Rewind: Week of August 4 - 8, 2008 Dive into a week's worth of Late Show highlights with Seth, Penelope, Donald and more.
