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Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Top Ten Secrets To Winning The Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show
  
When the judge examines your dog, "Accidentally" leave a folded twenty tucked into the collar.
For a healthy, lustrous coat, add a raw egg to your toilet water.
Hard work, patience and a ridiculous amount of de-worming cream.
Feed large dogs well so they're not tempted to snack on Chihuahuas.
Snausages and Red Bull.
In case of emergency, always keep a spare dog in your pants.
Give your dog a flea bath, and while you're at it, give yourself one.
(points to dog) This is actually two guys in a dog suit.
Tell the dog if she wins, she gets to be on Leno.
Ask Jose Canseco for some of that "high powered" kibble.
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